here’s the background on it…
here’s the background on it…
Doris/Joan is an idiot! She’s so in love with herself and her so-called message to the public that she doesn’t see that she makes an ass out of herself. But I’m sure others see her behavior, as you will see within this post.
There are THREE separate items in this post; all are related to each other.
I was shown a Facebook page announcement for a book signing, where Doris/Joan was to be in attendance, AFTER the show was over. Ruth and I then left a couple of comments.
Ruth Herr Sippel Pace I did not attend this – but will say this: Doris Michol Sippel’s book “Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity,” is nothing but a rehash of a book that she had pubished in 2009 by Trafford Publications under her adopted name of Joan Mary Wheeler, entitled “Forbidden Family.” That book was pulled from publication when proof of libelous statement contained within the book was sent to Trafford.
In November 2015, Ms. Wheeler self-published the book as “Forbidden Family: My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption, ” via Amazon’s Kindle.
In May 2016, Ms. Wheeler legally changed her name to the name she was given at birth, Doris Michol Sippel. She then had her book published AGAIN in September 2016 via Amazon’s Kindle under her new name, and changed the title to the book AGAIN to “Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity,” with no explanation to her customers of her name change or why she keeps changing the title of her book.
Each edition of her book remains 90% the same, the self-published kindle editions contain the same libelous materials that caused her first paperback edition to have been pulled from publication, and with additional libelous materials added in.
While I applaud local events giving local authors a venue to showcase their works, I suggest in the future, the persons organizing such events do some research on the authors and their material.
Discussions on Doris Michol Sippel’s (aka Joan Mary Wheeler) are readily found on google. please see this blog post: “Con Artist Joan Mary Wheeler, now known as Doris Michol Sippel strikes again by peddling to an unsuspecting public a book with a new title, a new author-name, BUT THE SAME CONTENTS INSIDE. ” https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/…/con-artist-joan…/
Gert Mcqueen I wish to inform your institution of the undesirable nature of a local author and her book. I am a family member to Doris Michol Sippel also known as Joan M Wheeler. Her book is a NOT a true story, it is filled with malicious fabrications and libel towards every member of TWO families; her birth and adoptive families. Please do not allow her to use your GOOD NAME to continue to damage family members. PLEASE look at Amazon for the reviews on her titles as well as my blog and Facebook pages.
Here are links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler (Doris Michol Sippel) says about me and family. The first book ‘Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism’ was published in 2009 but then was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011, for libelous material within the book. Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor! Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition! CALLED ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Talk about conning people!
thank you Gert Sippel McQueen
THEN AFTER WE SAW ITEM TWO (IN THIS POST) WE WROTE THE FOLLOWING COMMENTS
Ruth Herr Sippel Pace it has come to my attention via an anti-adoption facebook page, that Doris Michol Sippel had started screaming at another author at this event. Because the other author had questioned her about adoption and did not use ‘correct’ adoption terminology. And has now published that other author’s phone number and other contact information and has asked other ‘angry adult adoptees” to spam that author.
This book signing was Ms. Sippel’s first book signing event and she blew it by acting like a child. Then further complicates matters by engaging in revenge tactics. The libel containied in Ms. Sippel’s book that I speak about in my previous comment of November 27 were ‘revenge tactics’ agaisnt me.
I applaud the museum giving authors a venue to meet and greet the public and sell their works, and as a family member of Ms. Sippel, I extend my apologies for her behavor.
Gert Mcqueen if Doris M Sippel/Joan M Wheeler goes to book signings for the purpose of continued exploitation of 2 her families to promote her anti-adoption politics and ends up arguing with other authors and exposing them to spam tactics, because they are pro-adoption, then Doris/Joan ought to be banned from attending book signings, after all it is MINE family that is being exploited by Doris/Joan and the greater Buffalo population ought to know that. December 3 at 3:32pm
Found the following on
ABUSIVE ADOPTER ALERT – author Mary Arno
I was one of 65 local authors who presented their books for sale at the Buffalo (New York) History Museum on Sat Nov 26, 2016. This was my very first author event for my memoir, Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity. (Amazon)
The woman to my right handed me her book mark. She is a well-known author by the name of Mary Arno. Here is here contact info from her book mark: 716- 523-0200 www.MaryArno.com
(You will need it to send her emails to inform her about the reality of adoption. She has no clue.)
I gave her my flyer. She read it: “The death of my married mother when I was an infant led to my closed adoption. Eighteen years later, I was found by family I did not know I had.” Inside the flyer was a statement about sealed birth certificates and falsified birth certificates.
Mary Arno turned to me and said, “you sound very angry!”
I shot out at her, “I am now! Thank you for putting me on the defensive! I am the expert of my life!”
She said, “You should be mad at your BIOLOGICAL mother for giving you away, not at your adoptive parents…”
At hearing her refer to my MOTHER as my “BIOLOGICAL MOTHER”, I got even madder and began shouting at her. “My mother died!”
But she didn’t even acknowledge my loss. “Then you should be mad at your father for giving you away, not at your adoptive parents!”
“I never blamed my father for giving me away! He was in an impossible situation, a father of five children, his wife died of cancer, how I could blame him…”
Mary Arno shot back at me, “Oh no, it is clearly his fault! He willing gave you away! You SHOULD blame him!” And in the next breath, she asked, “Your adoptive parents loved you, didn’t they?”
I yelled, “Oh? My adoptive parents lied to me my entire life! Lies, lies, lies! And more lies! They knew I had sisters and a brother who lived 6 miles from me my entire childhood, yet they willfully prevented me from knowing my own siblings! I would hardly call that love! New York State stole my birth certificate and I’m not supposed to upset over that?”
“I am an adoptive mother so I have a different opinion than you do,” Mary Arno declared smugly.
I shouted back at her. “You did not give birth so your name does not belong on a birth certificate.”
“That is your opinion!” Mary Arno snapped back at me.
“It’s more than my opinion. I have 42 years of personal and professional experience in adoption reform. This is a global movement to eradicate adoption from the planet. Adoptees and mothers-of-adoption-loss are rising in protest against adoption.”
I told her I am fighting New York State for my right to my own birth certificate. She said I should do just that! As if I need her permission for my activism!
Then Mary Arno said to me, “So, writing your memoir, that must have been a very cathartic experience for you.”
Nice going. What a put-down. No, it actually was hard work. As if all adoptees who write memoirs write simply to “get it out of our systems” so “we can move on with our lives”. Hell, I wouldn’t wish this journey on my worst enemy.
Somehow, I got through he two hour event by talking with people as they came up to the table.
I sent Mary Arno a long email on the proper etiquette on how to talk with an adopted person. I encourage all adoptees and mothers-of-adoption-loss to do so as well.
Here is the front and back of Mary Arno’s bookmark with her website and contact info – email and phone number. Yes, she lives in Buffalo, New York. 716- 523-0200 www.MaryArno.com
1) Substitute anyone else who had been victimized by anything or experienced huge losses, and it’s obvious how inappropriate and insensitive her first comment was to …See More
Doris Michol Sippel Thank you. Why don’t you write to her and tell her that? I told her in my own words. She needs to hear form others. Because, obviously, she is so ill-informed and biased. December 1 at 10:01pm
Karen Beebe Wilson Buterbaugh You did a wonderful thing by educating this ignorant person who thinks she is some kind of authority on adoption!!! I applaud you and thank you for doing that!! Big smile on my face reading your responses to that ignorant adoptor!!! December 1 at 10:01pm
Doris Michol Sippel Karen Beebe Wilson Buterbaugh I sent her a very long email! With my typed book list of 135 books that I own! And several articles. Maybe you could write to her as well! She needs to hear from us! (Thank you by the way!) December 1 at 10:04pm
I sent an email on Dec 3, 2016, titled…you are being maliciously maligned by Doris M Sippel
Hello Mary Arno
My name is Gert McQueen. I am ccing this to Ruth Herr Sippel Pace. We are birth sisters to Doris M Sippel. It has come to my attention that Doris (known also as Joan M Wheeler) has begun a hate campaign against you. You ought to know that she is anti-adoption and uses book groups and book signings to promote her quasi political positions, exploiting both the adopted and birth families.
I am sharing the following for your information and would suggest that you make event organizers aware of Doris’ motives for her book, how the book is libelous and untrue, how she exploits her families, and the public and how she treats authors like yourself.
The first is what Ruth and I placed on the Buffalo History Museum’s Facebook when she saw the event.
The second is what I found just this morning on a Facebook page of anti-adoption, Doris’ call to attack you.
Please feel free to respond to myself and sister Ruth. Our blogs are listed in the following.
Thank you Gert McQueen
end of email sent
Now I have NOT heard back from Mary Arno, nor do I expect to, but I’m sure that she read the email and looked at the ‘items’ as presented to her and here.
Doris/Joan writes that she has a
‘book list of 135 books that I own! And several articles’ on the topic of adoption and adoptees!
Wow!!! That must certainly make her the authoritative voice on the subject and her logic to browbeat another!
She also writes…
‘This is a global movement to eradicate adoption from the planet.’
Hate to mention it, but it was I, me, Gert, who was the one who FIRST used the word ERADICATE in terms of adoption…this only means that Joan/Doris HAS BEEN reading my blog! nice going Joan!
All this proves that her ‘book’ is NOT selling well on Amazon, take a look at the reviews for example. She has laid out some money in order to have PRINTED books available for book signings! I know how that business works! If Joan/Doris continues to alienate other authors and gets DIS-INVITED to book signings…she will end of having a living room full of her precious book and no buyers! Idiot child that she is!
of course she has the right and ability to change her name, legally, but it doesn’t GAIN her any acceptance into the birth family, because we ALL were her victims and told her to get lost…AFTER she wrote that first book, and 2 more later…hasn’t given her any more status ANYWHERE, even in adoption land
Her chosen title has always been ‘Forbidden Family’ because she has this obsession; that being adopted meant she was ‘forbidden’ to know her birth family.
See end of this post for updated information… which also tells about Joan’s name change and the THIRD edition… but first here is THIS post.
Perhaps, that was true during her childhood with her adoptive parents, but like billions of others, as an adult she eventually KNEW her birth family. But that wasn’t enough for this idiot; she had to cause and make trouble within both families and then write libel about everyone, not once, but twice, in book form, and regurgitate it all over the Internet! Therefore she LOST both families.
In addition, because she couldn’t and didn’t ‘leave’ it (being adopted) alone she began to exhibit serious behavioral problems within her adoptive family, long before the birth family made contact. Then, once she was found and because she didn’t/doesn’t KNOW who or what she was/is and her behaviors were NOT accepted by the birth family, we of that family became her additional ‘targets’ of abuse. Because she hates, is angry, and has serious mental impairments, she poisons every relationship that she ever had, as well as any that come to her, now and in the future.
These are the main reasons why everything, in each version of her story, is so wrong. Because she writes NOT about her life but about how mean, horrible and deceptive her adoptive family were and all about that ‘forbidden family’ who refused to allow her, Joan, to do mean, horrible and deceptive things to them, particularly when each and EVERY member of the birth family refused to accept Joan’s negative behaviors!
With each incarnation, of the ‘book’, more and more embellishments were added to enhance her growing hatred for being adopted and for the two families that she came from, the birth and adoptive families! With each ‘additional’ death in the families, she FELT justified by ADDING more lies because ‘dead people can’t sue’, as she puts in print!
Joan’s one and only issue in LIFE is that she believes that because she is adopted the institution of adoption is wrong and needs to be abolished! She believes that everyone that had ANYTHING to do with her, from her two families has been and always will be against her. Joan is perfect! If only she wasn’t adopted and had those two horrible nasty families…even as she wants the entire world to know about her forbidden family she condemns them!
Now for the point and substance of this post…
Beginning in 2008 Joan M Wheeler, was out there, on the Internet, screaming her outrage and promoting her ‘life-story’ and for most of the time the families DID NOT know!
For the record here are some key points of Joan’s attempts to tell HER the story of TWO FAMILIES!
1) First; it was just Forbidden Family, as she was writing it since around 1976 and as in a 1999 manuscript that I and others have. Personally speaking, by 1981/82, I had divorced myself and family from Joan! I did NOT see her for 10 years because of her interference within my marriage and my minor children. When I saw her next, in 1992, she again caused trouble, so I again ignored her, only to have her continue to contact me! My last contact with her was in 2005 when she lied to me, about loving me, and then wrote more lies about me and my MINOR CHILDREN when she published that book in 2009!
2) Then it was The Secret is Out; 1990. This was NOT a full scale book but an article that included the REAL names of some of the birth siblings, without their permission! I was first shown this article, by Joan herself, at a reunion in 1992, but didn’t pay much attention, at that time; for within a 24 hour time period, Joan had cause YET another series of interference regarding me and my life. I wanted nothing more to do with her! I forgot about the article.
Unfortunately, others were taken advantage of over this ‘article’. The truth of that exposure and the interference, with family members, by a total unknown stranger, a friend of Joan’s, who attempted to intimidate the family members were DETAILED by Joan in both of the full book versions, BUT not by the truth of what actually occurred. I did not know of these various negative outcomes, to other family members, until the first book was published in 2009.
Here is a scan of the article and a link to my exposure of it
3) Then, in 2008, as she was looking to publish, Joan was all over the Internet speaking out and promoting her ‘new’ memoir! At that time, the title was… Forbidden Family: Memoir of a Found Adoptee. Obviously, this book (no matter what title) is NOT JUST a memoir; it is a hate manifesto full of libel!
The basis of THIS POST is this particular ‘title’ and the EVIDENCE is presented below, from a comment of Joan’s on March 14, 2008.
4) Then there are her various webpages starting in 2008! She has said in the past that we, the birth siblings, have ‘closed down’ her web sites! Such paranoia! Such power she gives to us! The reality is that ONCE she did publish, she was FORCED to deal with the truth FROM FAMILY and we have not and will not be silenced! Joan has ‘forbidden’, us, the ‘forbidden family’ from reading her blogs! Sure, like she can prevent someone, anyone, from READING anything on the Internet!
The current link to her blog is https://forbiddenfamily.com/
5) Then, in 2009, she published with Trafford Publications and it was titled Forbidden Family: A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism
When we sisters got hold of that book in December 2009, we immediately began to speak with the publisher, Trafford Publications. To refute and counter all her lies, Ruth and I created our blogs. The book was finally pulled from publication, by Trafford in May 2011, after their lawyers determined that the author had violated the contract, by writing libel. They will never publish it again. Joan’s reaction was ‘the book was out of print and sleeping’. From May/June of 2011 Joan kept ‘hinting’ that her book was being revised.
6) Then, in 2015 she created a ‘business’; Identity Press, a self-publishing company!
There are only 9 likes on the Facebook page and no word YET about any book release about identities and adoption!
7) Then, in May 2015, she ‘self-published’, via her ‘new’ business, the book eliminating any publishing ‘middle men’ thereby having full control of her lies about others. It has now became, Forbidden Family: My life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption.
I saw that this book was available in June 2015 and purchased it. I did NOT make it known publically, that I had, until on a news story I quoted Joan from that book. That brought Joan’s attention to me, as well as the adoptee organization that she wrote about, in the book.
The moment I did so, Joan, ‘released’ the book publically…
‘Kindle Edition released to the world July 18, 2015’.
But there was a PROBLEM! For Joan had ‘bad-mouthed’ several adoptee activists and she got some fallout. Her solution to the problem was to deleted four whole chapters, from the original!
Then the book format became available.
‘Print Edition released November 2, 2015’.
With each review of the book, on Amazon, I commented. I created ‘discussion’ topics as did Ruth.
So here’s a question for Joan…
How’s all that working out for you Joan? Certainly not what and how you expected it to be!
And NOW for evidence of this post; we see examples, in the following, of what I’ve just pointed out.
The following was gathered via a Google search. The web site is no longer available, but I have captured the ‘search’ information, the original ‘question’ and 2 of 4 answers, one of which is of course, Joan M Wheeler.
Mar 13, 2008 – Joan Wheeler says: March 14, 2008 at 6:40 am … You, the “parents” will find yourselves trying to defend why you lied. Building a parent-child …
To tell or to not tell? MARCH 12, 2008
Parents of egg donor kids are having a hard time disclosing the true biological origin to their children. Up to 44% of parents have decided not to tell their children how they were conceived. This surprises both psychologists and fertility specialists who had expected a higher rate of disclosure at a time when openness is encouraged about such matters.
Psychologists are trying to encourage parents to open up to their children in an age appropiate manner about their birth origins. Groups such as Resolve of the Bay State, held a seminar, “Talking with Children about Their Origins,” for prospective parents.
How would you feel about telling your child should you choose the egg donor route?
I think I’d fall into the “not sure” category. Perhaps it would also depend on the nature of the child. If I felt they can handle it. Of course if there was a medical need, I would tell.
I would 100% tell my child. I can see the opposite side though, and wouldn’t judge people for not telling.
Joan Wheeler March 14, 2008 at 6:40 am
I am a reunited adoptee, found by my 4 older full-blood siblings in 1974. Our mother died, our father relinquished me to adoption. My adoptive parents never wanted me to know the truth – ever. The betrayal, mistrust and hurt and rage I felt when I found out the truth was so completely devasting. I was 18, just finishing high school. My homelife was shattered, my life goals turned upside down. All because my adoptive parents never wanted me to know the truth. Beware: if you don’t tell the truth your egg-donor child will grow up and find out someway. You, the “parents” will find yourselves trying to defend why you lied. Building a parent-child relationship on a lie speaks volumns about the kind of people you are — and the child you love will end up hating you for causing such personal pain. You are not GOD. You do not own your child’s genes, nor do you own your child’s destiny. Give that donor-conceived PERSON human dignity and respect. Tell the truth before it backfires on YOU. I am 34 years in a reunion with my natrual family. My 92 year old adoptive mother finally understands what she did was wrong. Appologies now, 52 years later, are hardly enough to compensate for ridiculing me, mocking me, defiantly witholding the truth of birth from me — and treating me with disdain for becoming an adoption reform activist. My natrual father regrets giving me up. My adoptive father died 25 years ago and appologized for his part in the cover-up before he died. If you didn’t make your child the old-fashioned way, you’d better fess-up. Get the name of the egg donor and put that name on the birth certificate because she is the genetic mother. You are only the gestational mother. Put both destinctions on the birth certificate because that is the truth! If you cannot handle the truth yourselves, then how do you think that will affect your child? You can reach me at email@example.com. My memoir (and well-researched on repro-tech adoptees) will be published soon. Forbidden Family: Memoir of a Found Adoptee.
Gert back again here…
Joan wrote; My memoir (and well-researched on repro-tech adoptees) will be published soon. Forbidden Family: Memoir of a Found Adoptee.
NO there was no ‘well-researched’ material in that FIRST book and in the SECOND book she deleted four full chapters that HAD any worthwhile materials. Joan is only interested in telling her story and lying about her two sets of families.
Any author’s work should stand up to critical analysis and discussion; for without such, the ‘work’ is just a vanity piece written for personal attention! Because the author, of this particular vanity piece, has written ABOUT family members, it is all the more important to use critical analysis and thinking and engage in discussions.
I placed the following ‘discussion’ on the author’s page. Please do read and partake in discussion!
Your initial post: Aug 17, 2016 8:49:30 AM PDT
gert mcqueen says:
People can write comments on each review and can start discussions. I have six discussions about this book; Gert Mcqueen’s discussion topics. Each discussion goes into greater detail about aspects of this book. As well, you may click on my name, in any comment, to reach my profile page.
The topics are:
1) about the FORWARD.
2) Author’s description of what’s in the book.
3) changes in what’s in the book, about the author and bio sections
4) about the author and biography
5) The author is NOT a Late Discovery Adoptee!
6) The author has again rewritten the boiler-plate material!
here is the Permalink to all my discussions:
This is the third #13 review! Sib Ruth’s review was removed as was mine, via Amazon, because we are ‘not allowed’ to write a review! Then a person, who had a review, deleted it! Perhaps they didn’t want to be associated with the book!
So the total number of reviews and who wrote them keeps shifting around. But hey…isn’t #13 a ‘significant’ number!
Anyway…this NEW review is ‘short and sweet’ as the saying goes, but is NOT very sweet!
By S10 Pete on July 18, 2016
A powerful and yet very sad book, too bad everything is still the same years later. No forgiving going on.
Like I said, short and to the point and so I wrote a larger comment…
Jul 19, 2016 4:32:30 PM PDT
gert mcqueen says:
This book is not ‘powerful’; it’s seething with anger! It’s not ‘sad’; it’s pitiful and spiteful. Yep, it’s still the same, for the author is not interested in forgiving, she wants to tell her tale…so be it! As the author states, on page 366, ‘what I have learned…is to own up to the wrongs I have done, to make amends and to strive to be a better person, unless contact would be destructive to me.’ Ah, but forgiveness does NOT come with a one–way only condition! This book’s very existence is testimony to the fact that the author is not willing to forgive. For forgiveness to happen, she MUST let go of the stone that is dragging her down, and do her own work ON FORGIVING! – ‘There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.’ Hamlet, II, ii
Now let’s see how long it takes for this to become an issue as the last reviewer, Mark, turned out to be. In any event, seems as if this book is beginning to ‘stink’ as more and more people are moving away from Joan and/or don’t have much to say about it.
here’s a great article on learning and understanding behavioral patterns…