What REALLY is the motive of Joan M Wheeler taking her birth name of Doris M Sippel? Was it THOUGHT OUT or is there a MOTIVE?

If an adoptee changes their name, legally, back to the birth name, what is the motive/reason?

Is it really a good thing to ‘take back’ their birth name? What about others in that birth family whom NOW have to deal with this ‘new’ addition to their family tree/name? How do GENERATIONS, current and in the future, DEAL with this ‘interloper’ who ‘takes’ the family name, after adoption? How about general CONFUSIONS? Make no mistake confusions and more can happen when some takes and claims a NAME that others in a family KNOW nothing about!

She may be able to legally change her name back to her birth family name, but that does NOT give her any standing in the birth family. In fact it causes confusion and more, for generations to come. Doris M Sippel was born in 1956, adopted and became Joan M Wheeler. Regardless of the fact that she was ‘found’ in 1974, there STILL are, and in years to come, many in the birth family that either don’t want her in the family or haven’t a CLUE who she is!

Personally I call into questions Joan/Doris’s MOTIVES for doing so. She doesn’t hide her true emotions about how the birth family has treated her. How perfect for her to ‘do it to them’ by taking the birth family name! Yep, she just wants to get even because her ‘identity’ was taken from her. Forget the fact that the LAW is the LAW.

And the ‘confusion’ has only began…

I was shown a comment that was left on Joan/Doris’s Facebook page. After thinking about it I decided to email the gentleman. The following speaks for itself.

Here’s the comment I saw…

George Berben Hello Mrs Sippel, just asking, which book do you mean on the FB site of René Hoksbergen? The book with the picture of the book ( kind van de rekening) or the book wrote by René which I named in my collumn(“Kinderen die niet konden blijven. Zestig jaar adoptie in beeld” ?) If you ask for “Kind van de rekening, een verboden bestaan”you can also reply to me! bema@home.nl Thanks! Sorry if my English is too bad or I misunderstand your request. kind regardsGeorge.  November 3 at 3:15pm  http://henryne.wixsite.com/kindvanderekening     bema@home.nl


Here is the email exchange that we had…


Hello George Berben

I am writing to you because I saw a comment you wrote to Doris M Sippel.

As an introduction to you. I am Gert McQueen, eldest birth sibling of Doris M Sippel.

Sippel is our FAMILY name. Doris was adopted out when our mother died in 1956. Her adopted name is Joan M Wheeler. She only recently, in June, legally changed her name back to her birth name. She is NOT a MRS. ‘Mrs Sippel’ was our grandmother, then our mother and then 2 step mothers and our brother’s wife and his son’s wife etc etc.

Doris M Sippel or Joan M Wheeler (one and the same person) is NOT welcomed nor acknowledged in the birth family for her negative behaviors toward everyone, during reunion, and afterwards for writing a book of lies about both birth and adopted families, not once but three times.

Sometime in the 1980s she wrote a piece called ‘the Secret is Out’ and it was published in some journal in the Netherlands. In that article she gave ‘real’ names to our personal identities. That publication and other intrigues, with René Hoksbergen, caused great distress to some in our family and Rene involved himself in our family’s affairs; bad form! Then when Joan/Doris was ‘writing’ her memoir, unknown to the family, René Hoksbergen wrote a ‘forward’ for the book; that was in 2006.

Her first book Forbidden Family, A Half Orphan’s Account of Her Adoption, Reunion and Social Activism‘ was published in 2009 but then was pulled from publication by the publisher in May 2011, for libelous material within the book. Joan had violated the contract. Rene’s ‘forward’ was published in this edition with date of 2006.

Then in 2015, she ‘self-published’ a ‘revised’ version calling it ‘Forbidden Family, an adoptee duped by adoption’. Rene’s ‘forward’ was ‘altered’ and reprinted with the date of June 2015.

Then in 2016 Joan changed her name back to her birth name and rewrote and republished the SAME crap in another book; a Third edition called, ‘Forbidden Family: An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity’! Rene’s ‘forward’ was ‘altered’ and again reprinted with the date of June 2015.

???Does Rene know these facts and about the chapter, in the ‘false’ account, of his visit with Joan and other members of my family? Does he know that Joan/Doris continues to repeat falsehoods?

It is very easy to go to Amazon with those titles and see reviews/comments and discussions.

Here is a link to one of my blogs and a Facebook page for further info.


this blog’s title/sub title is… DUPED BY ADOPTION & AN WOMAN’S STRUGGLE FOR IDENTITY, A BOOK STUDY an in-depth analyzes of the books called Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by adoption & An Adopted Woman’s Struggle for Identity by Joan M Wheeler/Doris M Sippel.


While the topic of adoption does cause various emotions the practice of adoption is one of PERSONAL choice. I myself adopted my son in a ‘step-parent’ adoption and because Joan/Doris did not LIKE that, she violated my parental rights…for that I banished her from my life! The fact that she continues to write falsehoods and exposures and exploits our family is something that I and others will continue to counter with the truth.

She is not to be trusted. Even those in ‘mainstream’ American adoption reform distance themselves from her.

Thank you for your time

Gert McQueen (born Gertrude Mary Sippel)


Dear Gert McQueen,

Sorry for the big letters but  I have a visual problem and  my view is just 8 %. I saw  this message a few minuts ago because  I was for in the hospital for a few days after a traffic accident

Thank you for your information  and will send it to René Hoksbergen.

I Only reponse to  Doris Sippel/ Joan Wheeler because she asked more information about my autobiografic book about my life.

I can tell you  that you can’t find lies in my book because two lawyers did a good job by check up all the facts and are agree of the publication of my book.

I don’t know Doris Sippel/ Joan Wheeler and do’nt even know her books.  So I don’t even know what is a lie or what is teh truth she wrote.

Kind regards

George Berben ( born as George Reestman and adopted as George Abbenhuis but  in later years Berben. That is also not the  right name because it is given to me by the Government but still isn’t my real name. The government refuse to given me the real name of my biologic father. After the end of WW 2 1945/46 many children where born out of a realtion between Young girls an women and German soldiers or USA/Canadian soldiers and that is a black( shame on you) page in the Dutch history long time ago!


Dear Mr George B,

Thank you for your kind reply. I do hope that you are doing well after your accident. I understand your vision difficulty and hope that you are able to increase the size to your advantage.

Thank you for referring my information to Rene Hoksbergen. Yes, there are many incidents, in every country, in the past, present and in the future, that can be called ‘black (shame on you)’ social/history pages. Such is the world of humans! My concerns are with the accuracy and honor of my family, in particular my parents whom do not need to be exploited by Joan/Doris…but that’s my issues not yours.

Again, thanks for your reply and best wishes to you.

Gert McQueen



3 thoughts on “What REALLY is the motive of Joan M Wheeler taking her birth name of Doris M Sippel? Was it THOUGHT OUT or is there a MOTIVE?

  1. she never thinks things out. and having said that — it doesn’t matter to me that she takes that name – she will NEVER be part of our family. She forfeited that when she began her abuses towards us – starting back in the late 1970’s. She legally ceased to be part of our family when the Wheelers adopted her in January 1957, when the adoption was finalized. That’s it – end of story.
    I’ve said it before – I can go in front of a judge and have my NAME changed legally to Ruth Monroe. That will NEVER make a legal daughter of Marilyn Monroe.
    And that is what the legal entity of Joan Mary Wheeler did – she legally was Joan Mary Wheeler in January 1957. She legally became the entity Doris Michol Sippel in June 2016. BUT SHE WILL NEVER BE A LEGAL MEMBER OF OUR FAMILY – UNLESS OUR FATHER LEGALLY ADOPTS HER – THE PAPERS WERE SIGNED IN 1957 AND NEW YORK STATE RECOGNIZES HER AS A LEGAL MEMBER OF THE WHEELER FAMILY.
    And she will NEVER legally become a member of the Sippel family – EVER.
    She has no legal claim to our family. Just as in my example, if I changed my name to Ruth Monroe, I have NO LEGAL CLAIM TO THE MONROE FAMILY. Or even TRY to say that I should get a penny of the estate of Ms. Monroe.
    Joan/Doris is an entity unto herself – and she has only herself to blame. She was welcomed into our family in 1974, and when she began her abuses towards us – she was told to remove herself. She should have treated us better. We do not like being lied to or about, our parental decisions mocked and interfered with, monies stolen from us, false police and other reports filed against us, falsehoods about us spread all over the place. These are things family does not do to family.
    As for genetics – I don’t give a damn about it. After what she has done to me – I refuse to acknowledge it. And I’m not the only one in the family who feels the same way.

    Liked by 1 person

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