What is SO compelling about Joan M Wheeler’s book, DUPED BY ADOPTION?

I just placed ANOTHER point on the discussion thread for Joan’s book.

Go to Amazon

http://www.amazon.com/Forbidden-Family-Adoptee-Duped-Adoption-ebook/dp/B00X520CGW

Look at the six reviews and my comments to them, then look at the discussion that I started.

http://www.amazon.com/about-the-FORWARD-/forum/

If you are so moved, PLEASE contribute to the discussion.

Your post: Sep 23, 2015 3:11:47 PM PDT  a purchaser says:

Compelling! On this discussion I quoted the author of the ‘forward’, Rene Hoksbergen, of this book (My life as an adoptee duped by adoption) and asked a question.

4) `A life story of an adoptee can be very compelling. This is definitely the case with Joan Wheeler’s account.’ … why? What is so compelling about her account?

Heather Kuhn answered… ‘In terms of “What is so compelling about her account?” I would say, that is all the MORE reason for people to read the book!’

Of course, neither person seemed to tell me what is ‘compelling’ about this book.  So, I got to wondering about the meaning of this word; compelling.

From the Encyclopedia Britannica

compel compelled compelling    to drive — more at felt

to drive or urge forcefully or irresistibly ‹hunger compelled him to eat›
to cause to do or occur by overwhelming pressure ‹public opinion compelled her to sign the bill›
3 archaicto drive together, force

compelling that compels: as

a forceful ‹a personality›  b :demanding attention ‹for reasons› c convincing ‹no evidence›

From the American Heritage Dictionary

       Compel

  1. To force, drive, or constrain; Duty compelled him to volunteer.
  2. To necessitate or pressure by force; exact; The energy crisis compels fuel conservation.

Okay, so there’s the meanings! But, I still ask the question; what is SO compelling about her account? Here’s MY answer.

To be compelled means some sort of ‘felt drive’ to ‘do something’. Joan M Wheeler has a ‘felt drive’ to do something; to tell her story. BUT why? Because she believes that she was ‘duped by adoption’! She wants to ‘pressure by force’, be it her personality, words or tactics, to ‘convince’ by applying ‘overwhelming pressure’ and ‘demanding attention’ without (from this reader/writer’s opinion) NO EVIDENCE for her positions. I see NOTHING in her story that suggests that her story is compelling! If anything, this book rails against the institution of adoption!

end

Advertisements

Review #six (6) of ‘Forbidden Family; My Life as an Adoptee Duped by Adoption’ by Joan M Wheeler #6 Gina Miller

I’m flabbergasted and dumbfounded!

There really isn’t much more I can say at this junction. Here’s the review and my comment both of which are on Amazon.


Thank you for veing a vpice for adoptees. A great book

ByGINA MILLER “redbyrde2000”on September 17, 2015

Format: Kindle EditionVerified Purchase

Thank you for writing a true account of adoptee life. All too often adoptee’s stories are silenced and only then stories of the biological patents or the adoptive parents are listened to. Yet adoptees are the only victims of a trauma (separation from family) in which they are not only expected to never grieve or look for their missing family, but to show gratitude to the family that separated them. Thank you Joan for the voice you provided to adoptees. Keep fighting for us to get our birth certificates, a right that we are allowed under the 15th amendment, yet denied us by all but 7 states in rhe U.S.  (end)

My comment

Your initial post: Sep 17, 2015 4:42:40 PM PDT

a purchaser says:

This is A REVIEW? Gosh, Gina, have you ever heard about the spell checker, or, fact checking?

How do you know this book is a ‘true’ account of adoptee life? Just because it is written by an adoptee does NOT make it a truly true account; at best you can call this book ‘a one-sided account’. The author herself calls the book ‘MY LIFE AS AN ADOPTEE DUPED BY ADOPTION’. That makes the book biased to the adoptee’s point of view, with NO recourse or rebuttal from ANYONE mentioned in the book, be they adopted or birth family members. So, ALL references to these family members is CONDITIONED by the voice of the ADOPTEE; hardly a fair representation.

Gina, you say, ‘adoptees are the only victims of a trauma (separation from family) in which they are not only expected to never grieve or look for their missing family’

Oh really! Victims of ‘trauma’ are only adoptees? What about the birth siblings?

And Gina, you say, that adoptees ‘never grieve’ or ‘look for their family’ (member)! Oh really?? What about the birth siblings?

How do you, Gina, see these quotes from the book, wherein, the author quotes or recounts an ‘older birth sibling’s’ account?

Chapter 2 Truth “It was my memory of you that wouldn’t die. Year after year, on your birthday, I’d ask Daddy if he knew whose birthday it was. He’d nod his head, but wouldn’t look at me. He knew where you were, but wouldn’t tell me. Daddy never spoke of you, or Momma, but he knew I wasn’t gonna give up. Neither were the others. We were kids, but we knew we had a baby sister out there someplace.”

Chapter 4 Prior Knowledge “My oldest sister told me the truth about my birth and my adoption from her point of view. The more I thought about the facts as they were presented, the more questions I had. I needed answers.”

Gina you said, ‘but to show gratitude’…well, from my LONG life I’ve learned that if a person DOES NOT show gratitude FOR their life, or to those THAT had given even one minute of time to their life, the person, who can’t do that, is just plain miserable; perhaps the author?

Gina, how exactly has the author ‘fought’ for your rights? I’m sure readers would like to know.

15th Amendment? The right for African Americans to VOTE! What does THAT have to do with this book?

This reviewer has only proven that she regurgitates the author’s propaganda, for the reviewer hadn’t bothered to do any FACT FINDING.    End of my comment.

UPDATE  January 2016

since the above, my comment has been deleted, I edited and reposted, it was deleted, I edited it again and reposted…it is current up, for the moment, it does appear that Gina does NOT like my comments.

here are the others reviews…

1) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/21/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-one-1-of-3/

2) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/01/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-two-2-of-3/
3) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/09/3-of-3-what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-
about-her-latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-three/

4) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/22/i-interrupt-my-sequence-of-3-reviews-and-my-comments-to-bring-you-
this-newest-one-too-good-to-wait/

5) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/13/review-number-five-5-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-e-book-forbidden-family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-and-my-initial-comment/

7) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/10/22/review-7-of-joan-m-wheelers-revised-edition-of-her-garbage-book-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-says-the-book-describes-the-pain-of-being-a-victim/

8)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/01/review-number-eight-8-of-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption/

9)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/31/no-doubt-about-it-joan-m-wheelers-latest-revision-of-forbidden-family-duped-by-adoption-is-an-eye-opening-book-she-is-her-own-worst-enemy-and-she-doesnt-even-k/

10)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/review-10-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-people-do-see-behind-her-curtain/

11)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/04/review-11of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-not-everyone-is-duped/

12) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-12-or-is-it-11-of-joans-disgusting-book-duped-by-adoption/

13) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-13-for-duped-by-adoption-adoption-a-view-from-the-other-side/

Review number five (5) of Joan M Wheeler’s garbage e-book, ‘Forbidden Family, my life as an adoptee, duped by adoption’; and my initial comment! #5 Heather Kuhn

Birds of a feather…yep there are no shortages of angry adoptees that believe just like Joan does.

Come one, come all, I’ll answer you! While I can ‘understand’ your anger and betrayal, that doesn’t give you a blank check to use and abuse me and my family. Doesn’t matter to me, how many adoptees see Joan’s ‘point of view’ there are many others, that don’t. They may not speak out publicly; one has here on Amazon. Even if they don’t, that doesn’t mean they are not out there and believe like I do, that this book is worse than garbage. Nope this book shall never be a best-seller, so knock yourselves out NOW, cause there will not be another chance.

Here’s the latest, from another angry adoptee…

BUT FIRST AN UPDATE MAY 7, 2016…this review has been pulled by the reviewer. see this link for further info

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/05/07/reviewer-5-an-adoptee-pulls-her-reviewsupport-from-joan-m-wheelers-amazon-page-on-that-lying-book-duped-by-adoption/

AND NOW BACK TO THIS POST

Thinking of Adoption? Read this book. Format: Kindle Edition “Duped by Adoption”
By Heather Kuhn on September 2, 2015

This is an excellent book written by Joan Wheeler, an adoptee rights activist, who talks about all of the intricacies of her experiences with adoption. She takes her readers on a journey of being adopted, being found, and riding the waves of roller coasters in her reunion with her family. She discusses some real big difficulties with her reunion, and discusses some of the history of her family that affects her relationships.

This is not a fairy tale of adoption. While this is Joan’s personal experience, many other books and articles discuss some of the factors leading families to choose adoptions. And, for those who’ve reunited, they’ve found strange coincidences, history of orphanages in their families, other adoptions, and some beautiful coincidences. Joan tells her story, all the good and bad.

This is not for the weak of heart. Joan also goes into depth about the fraudulent practices of adoption, by falsifying birth certificates. While some proclaim that adoption has changed, the reality is that it has, it has become much more manipulative and coercive. In 1994, a movie, Baby Brokers ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109187/ ) came out about international adoption. However, there are also many other stories of parents since then who were coerced, as late as this past year, of parents who were tricked into signing their rights away. But, that is just from the parents perspective. The collateral damage is done to the child of that coercion and fraud, those who have internal (and external) battles between two opposing identities, two, sometimes, opposing sets of parents.

Some people who were adopted decide that they can’t choose, that both sets are their parents. Others claim loyalty to those who changed their diapers so for so long, still others return back to their parents, such as in the recent case of Chelsea O’Donnell, who left Rosie’s home to return to her mother, Deanna, when she was 18. Some choose to abandon all family ties, starting new and fresh. No matter which they choose, the journey is not easy.

Joan paints a picture of just some of the trials that being adopted pose. I hope that you will read her book and go on her journey with her.  End

And now my comment

Your initial post: Sep 6, 2015 12:01:32 PM PDT  a purchaser says: (Amazon calls me that)

If someone is THINKING OF ADOPTION?…this is NOT the book you want to read! Actually, the author is not an adoptee rights activist at all but an adoption abolitionist! She likes to ‘shock’ people by relating her self-torturing tormented mind-fugues in the hopes that THAT would make people STOP adopting. The author views adoption as a great evil that must be removed from the globe! The entire book is colored by her hatred of being adopted, a warped victim mentality wherein she has been singled out by social injustices that manifest into some major self-delusions.

Does this reviewer, Heather Kuhn, a personal friend and fellow angry adoptee, of the author, know that Joan has already updated and REMOVED 4 chapters in which all those ‘depth about the fraudulent practices of adoption’ is discussed? The author has a great need to constantly rewrite ‘her’ story, adding and subtracting; e-book format seems to be her ticket to accomplish that. No, this book will not help any form of adoption ‘reform’ for it is strictly the author’s way of holding two families hostage, exploiting them, like a political football so that the author can gain ‘fame and fortune’; both seem to elude the author. Talk about collateral damage!

This reviewer says, ‘Joan tells her story, all the good and bad’ but she forgot about the ‘ugly’.

Like this ugly…location 5561 ‘I became detached, aching for freedom, went from screaming rages to crying and sobbing spells, I was argumentative, irritable, very sad and angry. I’d have terrible temper tantrums in which I threw around toys, often breaking them, or ripping up paintings or drawings my children made…I was out of control lost in overwhelming sad grief. Thoughts of death and suicide cycled through me for years, have anxiety attacks’

Or this ugly…location 6577 ‘I’m writing this book to expose all the hate and to put an end to it.’

Or this ugly…location 6709 ‘She (adoptive mother) yelled, we did all the work, your father and I, (referring to adoptive father), paid for the upkeep of his child. Did he ever think of that? He gave you up for adoption because he could not afford to take care of you. We took care of you. Now the tables are turned. In my advanced age, living on a fixed income, I look back and see that he had the benefit of a working wife for thirty-some years! I had to quit my job to stay home with you, his child.’

Or this ugly…location 7326 ‘I can’t ‘just get over it’. This was a witch-hunt. I am a victim of persecution because I am adopted. I demand restitution for my life as a legitimately-born half orphan duped by adoption’

So please bring along a barf bag if you ever do read this garbage for it will turn your stomach! For unless you enjoy reading about physical and mental illnesses, constant yelling, screaming, fault finding and whining, this book is NOT for you. There is NOTHING in this book that is remotely related to Rosie O’Donnell, Baby Brokers, or any other ‘hot-topic’ issue within the adoptee’s rights movement for open adoption records! It’s all about an angry adoptee who has no respect for her two families, birth and adopted…that’s collateral damage!  end

NOW after my last blog post of reviewer #3 was posted on this blog, that night my comment, above, was REMOVED from the Amazon site! Coincidence? maybe maybe not. So, I re-posted my comment removing the sentence where I mention Heather is a personal friend of the author.  Your initial post: Sep 10, 2015 4:30:26 AM PDT

I had also noted that Heather’s review was ‘adjusted’; the link to the movie she quote was gone. So that adjustment was done by Amazon who also must have removed my comment because I said the reviewer was a personal friend of the author. In both situations, we must have violated some guideline rules. Hopefully my comment will now pass the rules.

NOW, what I could NOT say on Amazon:

Crazies are as crazies do! There’s no storage of idiots in the world, no matter what the topic is, there are those that just will NOT accept the way the rest of the world is going. Generally speaking I don’t give a rat’s ass about certain topics, issues or pop-culture concerns. I’m also aware that ‘change’ happens over a long period of time, regardless of what the ‘majority’ thinks and feels. But, when it comes to me and my family I MUST take a stand against lies, abuse, hypocrites and using my family as a political football!

I also take note of the fact that, at the moment, there is ONE reviewer, who speaks the truth of this book, all is not lost! Current count then is 5 reviews; one that sees and tells of the bullshit of the book and four that tell it from the leader of their pack! Adoptees don’t rule, in the long run!

Speaking of this particular ‘review’, it shows me that desperation is beginning to set in, in Joan’s camp! It’s also obvious that her ‘friends’ have not purchased nor read the freaking book! I’d really be surprised to know if they spend their MONEY on the thing, but then again, why should they! These idiots all think alike and therefore they don’t have to purchase or read another’s book; it’s a given that it’s true, an adoptee speaks and it’s true! This is the same thing that happened when Joan’s first book was published…massive angry adoptees running to Joan’s support ATTACKING the birth siblings!

Today, we also have Twitter! Much can be done there! It does amaze me how adoptees are so insular, regardless of where they are religiously and politically. They are, at the core, hypocrites. Conservatives or Christians once an adoptee is attacked they forego their high-bound standards and revert back to bigotry and hypocrisies!

And today, versus 5 years ago, we, the birth siblings, have other avenues, such as AMAZON and blogs, long standing ones and a NEW one plus a Facebook page! In addition, Joan’s reputation has ‘suffered’ because many mainstream adoptees and adoptee-reformists have been distancing themselves from her. I have found over the years that the best defense against Joan is the use of her OWN WORDS. Once her words are put out there they speak for themselves.

So I am confident that the truth of the matter shall prevail. here are the other current reviews

1) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/21/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-one-1-of-3/

2) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/01/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-two-2-of-3/
3) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/09/3-of-3-what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-
about-her-latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-three/

4) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/22/i-interrupt-my-sequence-of-3-reviews-and-my-comments-to-bring-you-
this-newest-one-too-good-to-wait/

6) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/18/review-six-6-of-forbidden-family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-by-joan-m-wheeler/

7) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/10/22/review-7-of-joan-m-wheelers-revised-edition-of-her-garbage-book-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-says-the-book-describes-the-pain-of-being-a-victim/

8)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/01/review-number-eight-8-of-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption/

9)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/31/no-doubt-about-it-joan-m-wheelers-latest-revision-of-forbidden-family-duped-by-adoption-is-an-eye-opening-book-she-is-her-own-worst-enemy-and-she-doesnt-even-k/

10)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/review-10-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-people-do-see-behind-her-curtain/

11)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/04/review-11of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-not-everyone-is-duped/

12) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-12-or-is-it-11-of-joans-disgusting-book-duped-by-adoption/

13) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-13-for-duped-by-adoption-adoption-a-view-from-the-other-side/

(3 of 3) What ‘duped by adoption’ Joan M Wheeler’s ‘friends’ have to say about her latest piece of garbage; #3 Lori Carangelo

I am placing each reviewer, and my comment to their review, in three separate posts, for they each are worth a post of their own. This introduction paragraph will be used for each one, as the necessary background needed if the posts are read out of order. Of course there are others, # 4 has already been posted and #5 will also have their post.

When I first saw and then purchased Joan’s latest remake of OTHER peoples’ lives, there were no reviews. It wasn’t until AFTER she saw that I quoted her, on a news site, that she announce it and promote it. Once she did that I went back to Amazon and placed a review, which subsequently was removed because I ‘know’ the author! My name was removed, via Amazon, on my comments to the reviewers to read ‘a purchaser’. That’s Amazon’s policy!

One of the three reviewers did NOT like my comment and removed her comment! Gosh what friends Joan has, they can’t take the heat! This reviewer really doesn’t like me!

Reviewer number three, my comment, then other developments and other thoughts

FORBIDDEN FEELINGS ON A FORBIDDEN TOPIC FINALLY OUT OF THE CLOSET 30 June 2015 By Lori Carangelo –

 In “Forbidden Family,” the author skillfully recounts her personal post adoption reunion experience, highlighting the emotional abuse to most adoptees upon whom lifelong secrecy is imposed regarding their origins and pre-adoption pasts. For those not familiar with the fact that most adoptees have “legally” falsified birth certificates, Wheeler includes images of her original and “amended” (post-adoption) birth certificates and other comparisons.

Joan Wheeler takes the reader within, so that the reader feels the trauma she experienced. By doing so, the reader can understand that, not only in Wheeler’s case, but also in most post-adoption reunions, no matter how they are handled, adoptees are meeting strangers who had been in on the secret to varying degrees…A “birth” mother, and often birth siblings, have memory of the child up to the point of relinquishment. The adoptive parent(s) are provided some degree of pre-adoption history and may or may not share what they know, at their discretion. “Forbidden Family” supports the need for abolition of secrecy in the adoption process and not just 18 or more years after finalization — as well as the need for better methods of transferring legal custody that are truly “in child’s best interests.”.

–Lori Carangelo, adoption activist, president of Americans For Open Records (AmFOR), and author of “Chosen Children,” “The Ultimate Search Book,” and “The Adoption and Donor Conception Factbook.”

Gert’s comment to the review, as ‘a purchaser says’, which is what Amazon calls my public name.

 This e-book, is a rehash of the first disaster (the actual living of the events), the second disaster (the first libelous book written by this author) and now this third disaster, because it contains additional hateful statements about those that have ‘passed on’. Why? Author states ‘dead people can’t sue’. It is certainly NOT written skillfully.

Feelings coming out of the closet? This book certainly is full of feelings of rage and hate, so perhaps those feelings, and the author, should go back into the closet. Afterall, she believes she’s been ‘duped by adoption’!

‘Highlighting the emotional abuse’ … abuse works both ways … it is learned and then assimulated and then passed on to others…abuse begets abuse. The way to stop the abuse is to break the cycle. So why does the author continue to punish others and herself? If she was emotionally abused, as she says, in this ‘docu-drama’, I did not find any explanation or indication that she actually ‘got any better’. Instead all I read is her continuation of the cycle of abuse. The use of descriptive narratives to flush out her story-lines by putting words and deeds into REAL people’s mouths and actions, is not very good means of activiting adoption reform.

This book is like ‘reality TV’ shows…it’s all made up for entertainment purposes…no one really takes these types of TV shows and books seriously. If the author truly wants reform and changes that she ought to write truthfully and professionally.

 Gert here again; developments…

Like I said the above review and comment were removed, I can only assume via the author of the review, Lori. On August 13, 2015 I checked Amazon and found the following rewrite of Lori’s review. Obviously, Joan had read a comment I placed on a news site the day before, in which I said I was writing and posting everything that was on Amazon. It doesn’t take much imagination to see that Joan and Lori got together and Lori wrote a new one. I have no explanation about the date of June 29, when it didn’t appear until August 13. Oh the mysterious ways of the internet.

Lori and I have had previous correspondence where she stated that since the first book was still on Amazon it meant that the book was still available and I was wrong. Gosh, I can’t explain those inner workings and complexities and mysterious ways of things to someone who is already convince that they are right! Lori, like Joan, is a great believer in their own greatness! In any event, here is Lori’s second attempt.

Strangers When They Meet  By Lori Carangelo on June 29, 2015  Format: Kindle Edition

 Joan Wheeler takes the reader within, so that the reader feels the trauma she experienced. By doing so, the reader can understand that, not only in Wheeler’s case, but also in most post-adoption reunions, no matter how they are handled, adoptees are meeting strangers who had been in on the secret to varying degrees. A “birth” mother, and in Wheeler’s case, birth siblings, have memory of the child up to the point of relinquishment. The adoptive parent(s) are provided some degree of pre-adoption history and may or may not share what they know,at their discretion. “Forbidden Family” supports the need for abolition of secrecy in the adoption process and not just 18 or more years after finalization — as well as the need for better forms of legal custody, such as individualized legal guardianships, that are truly “in child’s best interests

CHOSEN CHILDREN – Billion Dollar Babies in America’s Failed Foster Care, Adoption & Prison SystemsTHE ADOPTION and DONOR CONCEPTION FACTBOOK: The Only Comprehensive Source of U.S. & Global Data on the Invisible Families of Adoptiom, Foster Care & Donor ConceptionTHE ADOPTION and DONOR CONCEPTION FACTBOOK: The Only Comprehensive Source of U.S. & Global Data on the Invisible Families of Adoptiom, Foster Care & Donor Conception

And Gert’s commenta purchaser says: Your initial post: Aug 13, 2015 5:17:53 PM PDT

Nice sanitized rework! But still not an accurate depiction of the contents of the book! The ‘trauma’ that the author ‘experienced’ was, for the most part, one of her own making, ie. her failure to allow others to adopt if they choose to, and/or to think and do as they choose to. There is NO reason why the author should fabricate story-lines to fit her premise…that’s called ‘junk-science’. I know for fact that details in this book are not accurate, but totally from the author’s perceived ways that adoption ‘should/ought’ to be. Nice try, but no cigar!

This e-book, is still a rehash of the first disaster (the actual living of the events), the second disaster (the first libelous book written by this author) and now this third disaster, because it contains additional hateful statements about those that have ‘passed on’. Why? Author states at location 6577

‘If your father looks bad, it is his own fault, and yours too, for continuing hateful rumors. Uncle Mike died in 2002. Dead people cannot sue, nor can their heirs. Truth is a legal defense. I’m writing this book to expose all the hate and to put an end to it.’

Sounds like the author is ‘getting even’ with people for what? Her adoption? Does the author have a patent on truth? Her truth is NOT everyone else’s truth!  ‘Facts are stubborn things’…President John Adams

Gert here again…now before we go any further I will give these blog posts are references to previous contacts I’ve had with Lori. Besides these posts I would strongly encourage you to look at Lori’s sites and see for yourselves what kind of positions she takes on the issue of adoption. Birds of a feather, flock together.

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/americans-for-open-records-and-adopted-child-syndrome/

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/update-on-americans-for-open-records-and-adopted-child-syndromes-notice-of-joan-wheelers-libelous-book-forbidden-family/

Now going back to Lori’s (2) reviews. Look at her ‘references’. Obviously there was some type of typo for her references were repeated in the second one. Beyond that, look at the differences between the first and the second reviews. In the first she ‘is adoption activist, president of Americans For Open Records (AmFOR), and author’, in the second she is what? Some typo error!

It is apparent that Lori and Joan will not allow me to over-shadow their parades. Well, guess what, I’m not going anywhere. I shall just continue on.

And of course Joan has ALREADY started rewriting and changing. In August she REMOVED 4 whole chapters and ADDED a rewrite of a forward…that shall be addressed as well.

end  and here are the other current reviews

1) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/21/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-one-1-of-3/

2) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/01/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-two-2-of-3/
4) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/22/i-interrupt-my-sequence-of-3-reviews-and-my-comments-to-bring-you-
this-newest-one-too-good-to-wait/
5) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/13/review-number-five-5-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-e-book-forbidden-
family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-and-my-initial-comment/

6) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/18/review-six-6-of-forbidden-family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-by-joan-m-wheeler/

7 https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/10/22/review-7-of-joan-m-wheelers-revised-edition-of-her-garbage-book-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-says-the-book-describes-the-pain-of-being-a-victim/

8)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/01/review-number-eight-8-of-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption/

9)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/31/no-doubt-about-it-joan-m-wheelers-latest-revision-of-forbidden-family-duped-by-adoption-is-an-eye-opening-book-she-is-her-own-worst-enemy-and-she-doesnt-even-k/

10)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/review-10-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-people-do-see-behind-her-curtain/

11)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/04/review-11of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-not-everyone-is-duped/

12) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-12-or-is-it-11-of-joans-disgusting-book-duped-by-adoption/

13) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-13-for-duped-by-adoption-adoption-a-view-from-the-other-side/

(2 of 3) What ‘duped by adoption’ Joan M Wheeler’s ‘friends’ have to say about her latest piece of garbage; reviewer number two. (2 of 3)

update Aug 31, 2015…

seems that the author has updated her e-book, no surprise there, she’s always updating the ‘truth’…anyway…I want to update my posts as I go along…see my latest ‘comment’ on the end of my first comment.

I am placing each reviewer, and my comment to their review, in three separate posts, for they each are worth a post of their own. This introduction paragraph will be used for each one, as the necessary background needed if the posts are read out of order.

When I first saw and then purchased Joan’s latest remake of OTHER peoples’ lives, there were no reviews. It wasn’t until AFTER she saw that I quoted her, on a news site, that she announce it and promote it. Once she did that I went back to Amazon and placed a review, which subsequently was removed because I ‘know’ the author! My name was removed, via Amazon, on my comments to the reviewers to read ‘a purchaser’. That’s Amazon’s policy! One of the three reviewers did NOT like my comment and removed her comment! Gosh what friends Joan has, they can’t take the heat!

Reviewer number two and my comment and other thoughts;

 A personal account of the complications  created by adoption and how these could be reduced EvelynR June 21, 2015

 Joan Wheeler has produced an account of her personal experience of adoption separation. Although hers was a rather unusual family situation, she was adopted as a baby and, as with all adopted people, she was issued with a new birth certificate, which stated that her adoptive parents were her actual and only parents. Joan describes the complications and challenges of being a member of several families and the reader follows her journey of self-exploration, through her relationships with the many people to whom she is related in different ways. Joan concludes by outlining the ways in which she feels that adoptions should be conducted more honestly, in order to minimise the harm caused to those who experience separation from family members in this way. It is important for the world to hear from those with a personal experience of adoption to dispel the myths which are, sadly, so readily accepted in many parts of the world.

Gert’s reply…under comments… ‘a purchaser says’

 No one lives in a vacuum, with or without an original birth certificate. The author’s family was not unusual. I’m sure many would agree it is not in good taste to exploit families, with personal biases, in order to get changes into adoption. This revised book, as with the first version, is not about her self-exploration but about the work that needs to be done on the ‘self’.

The author’s life is NOT about ‘adoption separation’, let alone reform and OBCs, for if that was true, she would not have waited until chapter 52 to put out her ‘recommendations for change’; it would have been chapter ONE!

This piece of garbage is self-serving. As an example here, at location 6810 chapter 48 Elderly Parents, is what Joan writes…

‘when I read Dad’s death notice in the newspaper, I was hurt to see that my name was left out. That was just typical of the mindset of these people acting out of spite….Whether or not it was his choice to leave my name out of his death notice I will never know.’

The truth is that the ‘father’ removed the author from his pre-arranged papers in 2009 for his own reasons; family members didn’t knew until he died. Joan’s retelling is from her ‘perspective’, always and as in all families, EVERYONE has a perspective and voice. Finally, adoption has NOTHING to do with the subject of the book. The subject of the book is about someone believing they were ‘duped’.

My 2nd comment…

Well the author decided to update the ebook…apparently she doesn’t like chapters 49, 50, 51 and 52. As I said in previous comment chapter 52 was where the author gives her ‘recommendations for change’ and I suggested it should have been chapter 1 if she was promoting adoption reform! Guess she isn’t for reform after all…just wants to tell us all about her terrible life as an adoptee and a horrible life in reunion with birth family! But wait! she’ll be back! She rewrite those chapters, for now, with e-book, she can rewrite the ‘truth’ as many times as she will!

Gert here again… what I couldn’t say on Amazon.

It really is quite a stupid title for a book! ‘an adoptee, duped by adoption’! Just because Joan feels and believes that she was ‘duped’ doesn’t mean that everyone else has been or is! Nor does it mean that adoption is a fraud. But to hear Joan, and believe me the adoptive and birth families have HEARD Joan, you would think that the human race, around the globe, have all by duped, conned, hoodwinked and more by the INSTITUTION OF ADOPTION!

Oh sure, no system is perfect, shit happens, terrible shit happens, but get real! Joan is such a drama queen! But you know…MAINSTREAM adoptees don’t INVITE Joan and her garbage books on their circuits! This new improved piece of shit is NOT on any adoptee reading list. It is NOT on any adoptee WRITTEN book list and there are A LOT of them out there today. No, mainstream adoptee rights reformers and activists don’t want Joan around them. Joan is so out of step with the world not many of her own kind want her around them.

A really strange thing is, how fascinated Joan is with her ‘baby’ pictures! Look at the covers of the two books. They can be found on the ‘about’ page on the blog and on the Facebook page, of the same title; ‘The life and times of Joan M Wheeler; duped by adoption, a book study’

In the first book her eyes are closed. Long after that first book was pulled from publication, because Joan violated her contract with the publisher that she would not publish libel and other things, but she did! I had noticed that she changed her ‘icon’ in various places and started to use another ‘snap shot’ of herself as that infant…with eyes OPENED. You will note that I cropped the cover picture of the second book because her opened eyes are too ‘creepy’, period!

Joan could be a ‘changeling’ or a ‘bad seed’…such things do happen. None of the other four siblings born to the same parents have those creepy eyes! Genetics aside, Joan was NOT raised by the birth family. She was raised by a strange family and all her behaviors were LEARNED behaviors. No one in the birth family behaves as Joan does!

Was does EvelynR say that Joan had ‘a rather unusual family situation’?  I really don’t get that! There was NOTHING unusual…death of a parent happens quite often and children are placed into adoption for that and many other reasons. It is also not so unusual for ‘shirt-tail’ relations, generations removed, to have mingled and married within close ‘genetic’ relationships and/or to know the existence and identity of a child’s parentage! Joan is only UNIQUE in her own mind!

EvelynR also said ‘the complications and challenges of being a member of several families’. There were only TWO families; the birth and adoptive families.  It was the members of those two families that had ‘the complications and challenges’ when dealing WITH Joan, not the other way around! Joan was a problem child within the adoptive family that had nothing to do with the birth family. It was Joan’s own behaviors and her interferences and various back-stabbings, that caused ‘complications’ that, when told by Joan, became only those DONE by others and NOT by Joan herself. Seems all so one-sided, don’t you think? Joan is always the poor misunderstood child/victim at the raw end of the whip that everyone whipped her with! Give me a break!

‘the reader follows her journey of self-exploration’ EvelynR said of the book! Hate to break it to you Evelyn and others, but his book is not about ‘self-exploration’. It’s a detailed description of the neurosis and damaged brain-cells of Joan and how she ‘goes after everyone who hurt her or whom she hates’.

Case in point, why did Dad remove Joan from his pre-prepared end of life papers? Because Joan finally went over the line of decency and respect for her ‘father’! Joan’s take on it, how she tells it, is NOT the way it happened. In 2009 she attempted to con Dad into paying for her car repairs and to publish the book. He said NO to the car repairs, that was her car not his, and that he didn’t NEED her help any longer. He had read a draft of a long-complicated ‘social-work assessment’ (which she leaves out of this ebook) in which she INSULTED Dad’s heritage and religion! Yes, he kicked her out of his house, again, because each time someone disagrees with Joan, she MUST argue with them. Dad didn’t allow arguing, he had enough of Joan’s conning and yelling. Dad told her ‘call before you come over again’. In 2011, she didn’t call before coming over…but that’s another tale, for another time. It was AFTER he kicked her out that Dad CHANGED his papers and no one, not even his wife knew what he did, until he died and they saw his papers.

But in this piece of garbage, Joan rants and raves, jumping to conclusions, about how it was us, the birth sisters, who ‘took’ her name off Dad’s obit. She gave us powers we didn’t have! So expanding on what I quoted in my original comment above… Location 6807

 ‘When I read Dad’s death notice in the newspaper, I was hurt to see that my name was left out. That was just typical of the mindset of these people acting out of spite. So I purchased a death notice of my own. This man was my father and I was his daughter. No amount of anger toward me, or bickering over me not being his legal daughter at the time of his death, could change the fact that he was my father. Whether or not it was his choice to leave my name out of his death notice I will never know.’

Contrary to what Joan says, she DOES read our blogs and makes false assumptions about ourselves, other family members and actual events. Again, contrary to what Joan says, she NEVER was a full-time care-giver to Dad and step-mom, she was NOT privy to ANYTHING, no one in the birth family wanted her around. It certainly wasn’t the birth sisters, who removed Joan’s name from the obit! But in Joan’s mind we did and therefore it is a FACT and she printed it! That folks is called LIBEL!

I am including here a link to a post that I wrote back when Dad died. It’s details speak for themselves and of course Joan ‘read’ this back then. It is on Ruth’s blog because I did not have my own blog at the time.

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2011/01/17/legal-notice-to-joan-m-wheeler-part-3-by-gertrude-mcqueen-first-born-of-leonard-sippel/

legal-notice-to-joan-m-wheeler-part-3-by-gertrude-mcqueen-first-born-of-leonard-sippel/

And finally, EvelynR says;

‘It is important for the world to hear from those with a personal experience of adoption to dispel the myths which are, sadly, so readily accepted in many parts of the world.’

While that may be true, it will NOT be found in this piece of shit work. The mind of Joan M Wheeler does NOTHING to help dispel any myths, it only CONFIRMS that her mind is diseased, that she puts HER view upon others and her motives are purely selfish and revengeful.

end

1) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/21/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-one-1-of-3/

2) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/01/what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-about-her-
latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-two-2-of-3/
3) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/09/3-of-3-what-duped-by-adoption-joan-m-wheelers-friends-have-to-say-
about-her-latest-piece-of-garbage-reviewer-number-three/

4) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/08/22/i-interrupt-my-sequence-of-3-reviews-and-my-comments-to-bring-you-
this-newest-one-too-good-to-wait/
5) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/13/review-number-five-5-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-e-book-forbidden-
family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-and-my-initial-comment/

6) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/09/18/review-six-6-of-forbidden-family-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-
adoption-by-joan-m-wheeler/

7) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/10/22/review-7-of-joan-m-wheelers-revised-edition-of-her-garbage-book-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption-says-the-book-describes-the-pain-of-being-a-victim/

8)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/01/review-number-eight-8-of-my-life-as-an-adoptee-duped-by-adoption/

9)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/12/31/no-doubt-about-it-joan-m-wheelers-latest-revision-of-forbidden-family-duped-by-adoption-is-an-eye-opening-book-she-is-her-own-worst-enemy-and-she-doesnt-even-k/

10)  https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/03/review-10-of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-people-do-see-behind-her-curtain/

11)   https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/04/review-11of-joan-m-wheelers-garbage-book-not-everyone-is-duped/

12) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-12-or-is-it-11-of-joans-disgusting-book-duped-by-adoption/

13) https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/review-13-for-duped-by-adoption-adoption-a-view-from-the-other-side/